But Jesus said, “No, go home to your family, and tell them everything the Lord has done for you and how merciful he has been.”

Mark 5:19 NLT

NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!  Don’t you hate to hear that word sometimes?  Doesn’t it make you feel limited and that you are not in control of your own doing and being?  Isn’t it hard to hear this word from your own parents or loved ones let alone complete strangers?

Well we are hearing it today from all kinds of people.  As you see from the picture, NO is the key word these days.  No to friends and no to family…WOW! What has this world come to?  It has come to near desperation.  It has had a major change in such a short period of time and we had no control over it.  How does that make you feel?  How does it feel to know that you are quarantined to your home because someone you didn’t know strongly “suggested” that you do so or even made it mandatory in some areas and it may not have been any fault of your own? How can this be?  We can’t be with friends.  We can’t be with family.  We shouldn’t be away from our homes unless it is an emergency or picking up essentials.  How can this be a good thing? 

Yes, that is hard but you can do something about it.  Change your attitude towards it.  Change your mindset regarding it.  Why? Because in this particular situation the word “NO” is probably the best thing for us right now.  How can “no” be good? Because it appears to be saving many lives.  We are protecting ourselves and others.  We are doing our part in a bigger situation where initially we had no control but we do have a part where we can control ourselves, our attitudes.

This is similar to our prayer life.  I have been encouraging each of you to reach out to God and tell Him what you want, what your desires are, what is heavy on your heart.  But that does not mean God will give us everything that we ask for or in the way that we want it.  Even David prayed to God in Psalm 35:13 NLT and said, “Yet when they were ill, I grieved for them. I denied myself by fasting for them, but my prayers returned unanswered.” Sometimes unanswered prayers mean no. But if that happens that does not mean we should doubt God or resent Him?  It just means we should increase our faith and it does not hurt to ask God why He chose not to answer it or chose to say no.  It could simply be for your own good.  He may have something better in store and/or He knows that what you asked for may not have been good for you or the person you may have prayed for.  Some things also happen because God knows the beginning from the end and knows us better than we know ourselves so it could be to save us or others. 

In spite of David feeling that God did not answer him, he continued to pray in Psalm 42:8 NLT, “But each day the Lord pours his unfailing love upon me, and through each night I sing his songs, praying to God who gives me life”, simply because God was his creator and David knew no one else loved him like God did.  Take some time to read the Psalms because David is praying all through it in good times and bad, even when he felt unheard.

Jesus gives us hope in Matthew 6:6 NLT, “But when you pray, go away by yourself, shut the door behind you, and pray to your Father in private. Then your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.” He will reward you by answering your prayer according to what is best for you. I have to admit I was a bit confused then to read Matthew 7:7-8 NLT where Jesus says, “Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened.” According to that verse we will get what we ask for but I have also learned that as I seek and pursue Him more then what I am asking for will be what He wants me to have anyway.  This takes a lot of faith and I am struggling in that area mainly because of my fears but we will leave that for another day. 

I love the comment my Bible has regarding Matthew 7:7-8 NLT:

“Jesus tells us to persist in pursuing God.  People often give up after few halfhearted efforts and conclude that God cannot be found.  But knowing God takes faith, focus, and follow-through, and Jesus assures us that we will be rewarded.  Don’t give up in your efforts to seek God.  Continue to ask Him for more knowledge, patience, wisdom, love and understanding.  He will give them to you.”

Once we receive these blessings, we must be like the man talked about in Mark 5.  He was demon possessed by Legion, which means many.  Jesus healed him.  As a result, the man wanted to go with Jesus as he was going away and the Lord told him no.  Why? So that he could be a witness for all the Lord had done for him.  The story continues in Mark 5:20 NLT, “So the man started off to visit the Ten Towns^[a] of that region and began to proclaim the great things Jesus had done for him; and everyone was amazed at what he told them.”

Dear God, we do not like hearing the word “No” and I do not believe that was your intention when you created a perfect world.  But sin happened and while we do not have control over that in so many words, we do have control over our attitude towards the things that happen around us.  Hear us God.  Answer our prayers according to Your will.  As a result, may we be witnesses for You of Your amazing LOVE that you have for us.  For You are love and You do all for us because of Your love.

I love You! I thank You! In Jesus’ name…Amen!

This is all the more urgent, for you know how late it is; time is running out. Wake up, for our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed.

Romans 13:11 NLT

Many may be asking “Why now, God?” Some may be about to graduate from middle school, high school or even college?  Not many people are ok with missing their own graduation services.  Some may have received a new job but if it is considered nonessential then they may already be laid off.  Some may have started a new school and the state discontinued school for the remainder of the year.  Others may be looking forward to a much needed vacation but all the plans had to be cancelled and they will not receive a 100% refund, if any at all.  This is a difficult pill to swallow.

But God could be saying “Why not now?” 2 Peter 3:8-9 ESV tells us:

“But do not overlook this one fact, beloved, that with the Lord one day is as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day. The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.”

Everything happens in His timing, when He sees fit.  Who are we to say otherwise since He is the Creator of this world?  Even if you do not believe in God, you have to be asking Why? Or Why now?  Why such a global impact of significant proportions happening right now?  What is noteworthy of “right now”?

Acts 1:7 ESV says, “He said to them, “It is not for you to know times or seasons that the Father has fixed by His own authority.”

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts”, according to Isaiah 55:8-9 ESV.

The Lord is waiting on us.  2 Chronicles 7:14 NLT tells us, “if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and restore their land.”

We need to humble ourselves asking God for help.  I heard a pastor say, “Pride is the most hopeless, most incurable of all sin.”  We need to pray and seek God’s face and Jeremiah 29:13 NIV tells us, “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” We must also turn from our wicked/evil ways.  He will hear us as long as all this is done from our hearts.  He will forgive us of our sins if we are repentant and will “restore (our) land”.

Now God may not answer when we want Him to nor the way we want Him to but He promised that He will “not leave us, nor forsake us” (1 Kings 8:57 KJV)

Dear God, we may not understand why all of this is happening now but help us to understand what we can do right now.  Forgive us and help us turn to be the people you want us to be, Your people.  Hear us, O God and restore our souls!

I love You! I thank You! In Jesus’ name…Amen!

Your laws are always right; help me to understand them so I may live.

Psalm 119:144 NLT

With all that is going on in our world today, do you understand it?  Are you overwhelmed by the media? The dos and don’ts? The “social distancing” yet our government officials are on TV in groups?  Then there is social media.  Everyone is posting what we should do and how to prevent the coronavirus from spreading.  Some contradict each other and some are just repeats.  Talk about being inundated with information…good and bad!!!

Then there’s the spiritual aspect…do we go to the church building or not?  Do we meet in groups no more than 250, then no more than 50, then no more than 10? Now which service do we follow…our own church or the one in NY you’ve been wanting to visit? Which Bible Study do you do whether fear, faith, panic, worry, love, isolation?

We have so many mixed emotions that sometimes we don’t know where we are going or what we are doing and if we are doing it right or not.

Initially, the thought for this blog came to me in my study of Daniel.  The book of Daniel along with the book of Revelation are some of the most challenging books in the Bible yet they speak to the validity and accuracy of the Bible so they are very important. But as we, the world, have been changing moment by moment because of the coronavirus, I also am confused about what is really going on…especially spiritually.

My husband often talks of what happens in the spiritual realm.  At first, I did not understand it although I often speak of Ephesians 6:12 NKJV: “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.“

While studying Daniel, I learned that when he had a vision in Daniel 10 NKJV:

¹² Then he said to me, “Do not fear, Daniel, for from the first day that you set your heart to understand, and to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard; and I have come because of your words. 

¹³ But the prince of the kingdom of Persia withstood me twenty-one days; and behold, Michael, one of the chief princes, came to help me, for I had been left alone there with the kings of Persia. 

¹⁴ Now I have come to make you understand what will happen to your people in the latter days, for the vision refers to many days yet to come.”

Things are happening that we are unaware.  I’ll confess that I do not understand all of it. But this is the time when we have to practice faith over fear and peace over panic.

I constantly ask God to grant me wisdom and understanding but I also know that there are some things I may never understand or even know for several reasons (1) because it may be too above my head and I am not in the right mind space to get it and (2) Deuteronomy 29:29 NKJV says “The secret things belong to the Lord our God, but those things which are revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may do all the words of this law.”

So let me be honest…I don’t understand.  I am not sure what to believe.  I hear stories that seem right and logical.  Then I hear opposite stories that seem right and logical.  We are living in scary times and don’t know who to trust.  But Proverbs 3:5 NLT reminds us that we should “Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.”

We need to stay prayed up and studied up because “false messiahs and false prophets will appear and perform great signs and wonders to deceive, if possible, even the elect (God’s chosen ones).” (Matthew 24:24 NIV)

Dear God, as Psalm 27:9 NKJV says,“Do not hide Your face from me; Do not turn Your servant away in anger; You have been my help; Do not leave me nor forsake me, O God of my salvation.”

I love You! I thank You! In Jesus’ name…Amen!

Jesus responded, “Why are you afraid? You have so little faith!” Then he got up and rebuked the wind and waves, and suddenly there was a great calm.

Matthew 8:26 NLT

OK. I’ll admit it.  I’m a bit worried, nervous, concerned (whatever word you want to use) regarding the spread of the coronavirus.  Apparently, I am not the only one.  I went to two grocery stores today and the shelves were bare, even of items that one would think are non-essentials during this kind of sickness.  I still can’t wrap my head around the shortage of toilet tissue if an upset stomach or diarrhea is not one of the symptoms.

The story behind Matthew 8:26 is this:

Matthew 8:23 – 27 NLT

Jesus Calms the Storm

²³ Then Jesus got into the boat and started across the lake with his disciples. ²⁴ Suddenly, a fierce storm struck the lake, with waves breaking into the boat. But Jesus was sleeping. ²⁵ The disciples went and woke him up, shouting, “Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!”

²⁶ Jesus responded, “Why are you afraid? You have so little faith!” Then he got up and rebuked the wind and waves, and suddenly there was a great calm.

²⁷ The disciples were amazed. “Who is this man?” they asked. “Even the winds and waves obey him!”

Think about the storms in your life.  Even before the coronavirus?  Have you had to deal with situations where you have no idea what to do?  Have you had to isolate yourselves from others or greet with “social distancing” depending on where you are or how you feel? Have you isolated yourself on purpose because you don’t want to face what is surrounding you?  You are not alone.  While your storm may be different from my storm, we all have storms.  Big, little, intense, mild…it is still a storm.

I love this post I’ve seen often on Facebook recently:

Especially where the verse says, “your God is with you wherever you go”.  No matter what we are going through our God is with us.  But have you made Him your God?  Have you chosen to try Him and believe…even with the faith the size of a mustard seed?

It is difficult to see that our God is with us sometimes, especially if we have not been looking for Him all along.  This won’t be easy but it’s worth it because it gives us hope.

May I suggest you read Psalm 91 for some words of comfort and protection:

Verses 9-10 are significant:

⁹ If you make the Lord your refuge,
    if you make the Most High your shelter,
¹⁰ no evil will conquer you;
    no plague will come near your home.

I heard a Pastor today say that it is not a plague but a sign.  Either way, this current situation with the coronavirus tells us to be ready.  Ready for what? For Christ’s soon return.  What does that mean? Ask Him.  Read His Word.  He’ll let you know what that means in the way that is best for you to understand but you have to be open and want to understand.

As we consider the storms, including the effects of the coronavirus, may we remember what my Pastor shared in his devotion today:

“The coronavirus wind and waves might seem huge, but Jesus will keep us afloat and thriving in His light.”

Dear God, this is a difficult time and it’s only the beginning.  Sometimes it is difficult to remember that You are in control.  Help us find peace, comfort, and hope in You.  I pray for others that are not sure what to do or what to believe at this time.  Please show Yourself in a way that each one of us can see You and know it’s You.

I love You! I thank You! In Jesus’ name…Amen!

Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies.

Proverbs 31:10 KJV

At the time I am writing this, today marks 2 years since the passing of my mother…my hero.  She was the virtuous woman I looked up to every day.  I consider her in all my thoughts and decisions wondering what she would say or do.

Proverbs 31 NLT

¹⁰ Who can find a virtuous and capable wife?
    She is more precious than rubies.
¹¹ Her husband can trust her,
    and she will greatly enrich his life.
¹² She brings him good, not harm,
    all the days of her life.

My mother was trusted by my father whom he sought her for advice.

¹³ She finds wool and flax
    and busily spins it.
¹⁴ She is like a merchant’s ship,
    bringing her food from afar.
¹⁵ She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household
    and plan the day’s work for her servant girls.

Although she was not a seamstress, she was best friends to the best in town and made sure that not only were we dressed to the nines (“to perfection” or “to the highest degree”), so was she.  She fed us rich Caribbean dishes teaching us of her culture and even taking us there to learn.  She was definitely an early riser taking care of all of us, one handsome husband and three beautiful girls.  While she did not have servants, even if she did, she would have treated them as her own family.

¹⁶ She goes to inspect a field and buys it;
    with her earnings she plants a vineyard.
¹⁷ She is energetic and strong,
    a hard worker.
¹⁸ She makes sure her dealings are profitable;
    her lamp burns late into the night.

My mother was a shopper but very particular with what she purchased.  She only bought the best making sure she and we were always presentable and appropriate.  Her girls were her vineyard she invested in.  Raising us as priceless wine.  She was a strong women not only physically but mentally, emotionally and most definitely spiritually.  She worked hard at everything she put her mind or hands to with nothing less than perfection and excellence.  She always made wise decisions or bounced back from those that may not have worked to her liking and she never stopped until the work was done.

¹⁹ Her hands are busy spinning thread,
    her fingers twisting fiber.
²⁰ She extends a helping hand to the poor
    and opens her arms to the needy.
²¹ She has no fear of winter for her household,
    for everyone has warm clothes.

She was always busy taking care of us and our needs making sure we always had.  If she could not do it, she found someone who did. She also cared for others in need whether by monetary or clothes donation or some other form of community service.  Our Caribbean trips started out with full suitcases but came back empty every time as we shared what we had with others.  We were always warm and cozy, not only in clothes but in enormous love.

²² She makes her own bedspreads.
    She dresses in fine linen and purple gowns.
²³ Her husband is well known at the city gates,
    where he sits with the other civic leaders.
²⁴ She makes belted linen garments
    and sashes to sell to the merchants.

Always in fine clothing supporting a man of distinction.

²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity,
    and she laughs without fear of the future.
²⁶ When she speaks, her words are wise,
    and she gives instructions with kindness.
²⁷ She carefully watches everything in her household
    and suffers nothing from laziness.

My mother was the strongest person I knew and always kept her head up.  While I learned later of her concerns of the future she had a warming laugh that made us feel everything was going to be ok.  She was gentle in her words yet assertive.  She demanded respect even without speaking.  Never lazy. Always doing. We felt like we had everything.

²⁸ Her children stand and bless her.
    Her husband praises her:
²⁹ “There are many virtuous and capable women in the world,
    but you surpass them all!”

I honor her, even in her death, above any other woman.  She, to me, “surpassed them all!”

³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last;
    but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.
³¹ Reward her for all she has done.
    Let her deeds publicly declare her praise.

My mother is greatly praised!

Dear God, I miss my mother so much! I know there may be others who did not have a mother like mine or a relationship with their mother like mine.  If not, I pray that you send them a woman to be an integral part in their lives to teach them, reach them, invest in them and give them the love they need to be virtuous people themselves.

I love You! I thank You! In Jesus’ name…Amen!

In the same way, the Spirit also helps us in our weakness, since we do not know how to pray as we should. But the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans too deep for words,

Romans 8:26 International Standard Version (ISV)

My hope for this blog is to help you get to a place where you can talk with God.  No matter how you feel or what you are going through talk with God.  But I also have to admit that this is not an easy thing to do.  When you finally say “I will do it.  I will talk with God”, what do you say?  Do you struggle with your words?  Are you overwhelmed with your thoughts and feelings?  Where do you even begin?

I get it.  It happens to me often and for several reasons.  Most of the time it’s because I’m overwhelmed with my thoughts and feelings.  I want to talk to Him about everything and sometimes about nothing.  I may be ashamed, mad at myself, uncomfortable, or even mad at God.  Sometimes I have to admit I don’t want to talk with Him at all.  But I know I should.  I know I need to let go of the things that bother me or worry me.  I know I need to let go of the things that stress me out.  Sometimes I just don’t know what to say.

Other times I have too much to say.  I get so overwhelmed that when my husband and I pray together and we ask each other for pray requests, at least one of us says “everything” almost every night.  We want to talk with God about so much that often times we cannot even identify the top three things that are of most importance.  When I get that way everything is important.  Everything is priority.  Everything needs His help.

The verse above came to mind.  Even when we are in the midst of our quietness or overwhelming feelings, God provided someone to help us in this area.  While we know that God knows everything, He still wants to hear it from us.  He wants to hear what bothers us, what worries us, and what makes us happy.  He understands and knows how things can be overwhelming which is why He gave us the Holy Spirit to make “intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered”. (KJV)  Thank God for the Holy Spirit!

But that is not the only way God hears us without words.  At times, even our tears can speak on our behalf.  We get so full with emotions that they can tell God all He needs to know from our hearts.  Here are some examples in the Bible we can reference for confirmation:

Hezekiah pleaded for healing:

2 Kings 20:5 NLT

Go back to Hezekiah, the leader of my people. Tell him, ‘This is what the LORD, the God of your ancestor David, says: I have heard your prayer and seen your tears. I will heal you, and three days from now you will get out of bed and go to the Temple of the LORD. 

Job cried out to God although his friends where there to supposedly comfort him:

Job 16:20 NLT

My friends scorn me, but I pour out my tears to God.

David realized how short life was and appealed for God’s mercy:

Psalm 39:12 NLT

Hear my prayer, O LORD! Listen to my cries for help! Don’t ignore my tears. For I am your guest— a traveler passing through, as my ancestors were before me.

Please take these references as reminders that we are not alone in our sufferings, disappointments or even our celebrations.  God hears us whether we pray with our own words, groanings through the Holy Spirit or our tears.

Dear God, often we come thinking our prayers have to sound like they are straight from the Bible because that may have been what we were accustomed to hearing or how we learned to talk with You.  As a result, we are afraid to even say something if we are not comfortable with that style let alone even know what to say or what words to use.  Thank you for sending the Holy Spirit to not only be our Comforter but even our Advocate in Your presence letting you know what is going on with us…especially what’s in our hearts.  Thank you for the examples you provided to us through Your Word so that we know even the man after God’s own heart, David, cried out to You and You heard Him (But God removed Saul and replaced him with David, a man about whom God said, ‘I have found David son of Jesse, a man after my own heart. He will do everything I want him to do’. Acts 13:22 NLT).  Please continue to hear us.

I love You! I thank You! In Jesus’ name…Amen!

O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?”

1 Corinthians 15:55 NLT

As I am writing this, it is almost time for the memorial service of Kobe Bryant and his daughter Gianna.  A few weeks ago they, along with seven other passengers, lost their lives in a helicopter accident.  The world appeared to be dumbfounded when the news was first released and didn’t believe it was true initially but as time passed and continuous confirmation on social media appeared there was nothing else to do than to believe Kobe Bryant, the legendary former Lakers Basketball Player was gone.  He was really gone.

Over a decade ago, I had a similar experience.  I was at work on a Friday morning and I received a call that my father was in a car accident.  I don’t actually remember if the person who called me used the word “terrible” to describe the accident but I do remember thinking it was odd to receive that kind of call from this particular person.  Simply because they we in the same state as I yet my father was in a different state.  I hung around work for a little longer by the phone as there wasn’t much I could do.

Long story short, my mother was able to get to the hospital and my cousins were with her where one of them was a doctor.  That provided comfort as she was able to interpret what was going on and was able to explain to me as well.  The situation was bad.  He had internal bleeding and he never opened his eyes.  I left early as I was now useless at work and in less than 15 minutes I received the call that my dad had passed away due to the injuries.

I was in disbelief yet something kicked in.  I can’t explain it even today.  It was a sense of control.  I couldn’t even shed a tear.  It was more important to me that everyone else was ok.  I made sure my cousins took care of my mom until we were able to get there.  I told my sister and confirmed her husband was with her.  I then went to tell my close friend yet there was such peace.  The hardest part was having to tell my children.  How do you do that?  They were so young at the time.  What made matters worse was that my son called my dad his best friend.  What?  I never knew that!!!  Oh my goodness! How heartbreaking!  Then I knew something was wrong with me because I still didn’t cry.

My sister and I traveled to my mom to make arrangements.  Again, a sense of control took over.  I just knew once I saw him I would lose it.  But I didn’t.  I examined him to make sure he was presentable as the distinguished handsome man that he was.  He always took care of his appearance so there was no way he would look any less than usual, as far as possible.  What did happen to me through those events though was the realization that He was gone.  He really was gone.

Many times I’ve wanted to talk with him about a particular topic or ask him to clarify something I may have been studying in the Bible but I couldn’t.  When the holidays come I would wish they were coming to see us but that is no more.  He is really gone.  I do believe God showed me mercy in my grieving and showed me that He was in control.

Less than two thousand years ago there was another man who died and the people could not believe it was true, especially those that loved Him the most (Luke 23:32-55).  To add to their state of confusion, His body was missing after a few days (Luke 24:1-12).  His heavenly loved ones shared with His earthly loved ones that though He was dead and gone He is now alive.  This man, Jesus, told His loved ones that He would return but in their sadness they did not remember or even fully understand.  But He did come back and appeared before them (Luke 24:35-49).

I believe this story.  I believe in Jesus birth, death and resurrection.  I believe in His love, mercy, and care for His loved ones…His people.  And I definitely believe because this story gives me hope.  Hope that I will see my loved ones again.

Now it is hard to comprehend that once someone dies they can come back to life.  It is even harder to read the story, among other stories of the Bible, because they seem unbelievable.  But they are true.  If you compare many events of the Bible to historical events and findings, you will see that one supports the other.  Look at the book of Daniel, specifically.  You must wonder, “if these events are true, then there may be other events in the Bible that are true and will come to pass”.  I believe the Bible is true but that does not mean you have to believe because I do.  I wish it was that easy but I want you to know for yourself.  I want you to read the Bible.  I want you to reach out and say, “Dear God can you clarify this verse for me?  Can you give me understanding of this story?”

I want you to find the hope of the resurrection and restoration.  And if you don’t in your first reading, continue to read and continue to ask God.  You must have an opened mind to learning something new and that applies here as well.

While my dad is really gone, I thank God for His mercy and I have hope in Jesus that I will see my Dad again.  It is not easy to digest such an awesome event but I am still reading and learning and asking God for discernment and understanding.  I hope and pray you want to do the same as well.

Dear God, I’m now crying because my dad is really gone.  I miss him more and more everyday especially when I realize the sacrifices he made for us.  But Your Word says, “…Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning.” Psalm 30:5b NLT.  Thank you for the hope in Jesus.  It’s always good to have something to look forward to and not live in despair.

I love You! I thank You! In Jesus’ name…Amen!

When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

1 Corinthians 13:11 NKJV

This is a running joke between my husband and me.  Whenever either one of us behaviors in a way outside of our norm the other asks the question, “What happened to you when you were 7?  Meaning, what happened to you in your past that is causing you to behave or react this way?  We joke and we laugh but for many of us that is a serious question.

What happened to you at the age of 7, 15, 35, 42, or yesterday that causes you to behave in a certain way?  This behavior could be considered good, bad, different, or strange.  But who are we to judge?  Matthew 7:1 NIV says “Do not judge, or you too will be judged.”

What does this behavior say about you?  Does the past experience make you happy, sad, bite someone’s head off when they say a certain word or phrase?  Did it make you an introvert or an extrovert?  Is it something you need to get analyzed or possibly receive support for?

Often we blame others for why we behave or respond the way we do and many times it is not someone else’s fault but our own.  It is not their fault that you cry whenever you hear a person’s name.  It is not their fault when you yell at them because they bumped into you by mistake.  It is definitely not their fault when it’s raining and there is traffic or the train is delayed and you are late for work which causes you to walk around with a growl like a protective pit-bull.

Sometimes we need to take a step back and look at ourselves before we look or blame others.  When I was in elementary school, my best friend at the time chose not to talk to me for one day because someone dared her.  Now in elementary school friends change all the time but at that age this really bothered me.  As a result, for many years, I chose not to be close to anyone like that again.  Even with those that I did choose to be close too I was afraid to even put a label on it as “Best Friends”.  But I was wrong.

Sometimes I wonder how many special friendships I missed because I was standoffish and had a mean look on my face since I didn’t want to get close to them.  How many people, that I chose not to get close to, could have positively impacted my life or vice versa in various ways?  You see I am using the words “chose” or “choose”.  Did I really know what choice I was making in elementary school and did I truly know then the impact it would have on my life now? 

I cannot put all the blame on my friend from elementary school.  She made a choice but so did I.  Do I have to continue to live that way now? Absolutely not!  This is something I can change on my own because I chose to but not always can we make these changes on our own.  We need help.  Honestly, with the level of hurt I had as a little girl, I’m not really making this change on my own.  I continually ask God for discernment regarding friends and relationships especially in my seasons of growth.  Was I hurt?  Yes.  Did I live through it?  Yes.  Am I a better person for it? Yes.

There may be something for you that’s not easy to fix, change or even pray about.  But you can begin by just acknowledging that there may be something that is all you and not the person who just cut in front of you in traffic or in the line.

Choices.  They are impactful and they are powerful…big ones and small ones…but they are ours.  But you do not have to decide all by yourself.  I pray you come to God with your choices, those already decided and those that still need to be decided.  Allow Him to help you make the best choice for you.

Dear God, while we do have to live with the consequences of our choices, help us to realize the type of behavior we display as a result of our choices as well.  In that realization, help us to see why we do what we do and if we need to change that we should start by making the choice to change and bring it to You.  May I be so bold to ask that if You see our behavior that may be destructive yet we don’t see it that way, please open our eyes, mind and heart and see what’s happening too because it does not only impact us but also those in our sphere of influence and those we don’t even know are watching.

I love You! I thank You! In Jesus’ name…Amen!

“Go out and stand before me on the mountain,” the Lord told him. And as Elijah stood there, the Lord passed by, and a mighty windstorm hit the mountain. It was such a terrible blast that the rocks were torn loose, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. And after the earthquake there was a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire there was the sound of a gentle whisper.     

1 Kings 19:11, 12 NLT

So far, most of what I have written involves talking to or with God, coming to Him even when we are mad at Him or don’t feel loved by Him or others for that matter.  But when He does respond to you, can you hear Him?  I mean, do you hear an audible voice?  Do you feel an impression?  Did He speak to you through your friend, your spouse, your boss, your enemy?

I have had trouble hearing Him and not knowing what He wants me to do.  I hear some of my friends say that God told them to do this or God led them to do that.  I would always question “How do you know that that guidance came from God?” “How did it come?”  Some say they just know or they had an impression. 

I have been asking God day in and day out to show me something…to tell me something, and I got nothing…at least that is how I felt.  But I persevered and I had to be real with myself.  Was I allowing God to respond to me?  Did I keep myself quiet enough to hear him?  Was I still enough to realize and acknowledge an impression?  Did I trust or favor that friend enough to consider that what he/she said to me could have been God-inspired?  I was so busy doing what I thought I needed to do that I realized He could have been yelling at me and I would not have even known it. 

Our verse tells us that God responds with “the sound of a gentle whisper”.  The King James Version (KJV) uses the term “still small voice”.  In Elijah’s case it was not in the raging winds, nor in the earthquake, nor in the fire.  That is not to say that God does not respond to us in big ways or in major events but sometimes because He talks to us quietly we may miss it.  I have a Life Application Study Bible and I love the comments that are added for most verses.  For our verses the comment reads “Elijah knew that the sound of a gentle whisper was God’s voice.  He realized that God doesn’t reveal himself only in powerful, miraculous ways.  To look for God only in something big (rallies, churches, conferences, highly visible leaders) may be to miss Him because He is often found gently whispering in the quietness of a humbled heart…Step back from the noise and activity of your busy life and listen humbly and quietly for His guidance.  It may come when you least expect it.”  That is just what I needed to hear.

My husband has a testimony where he shares that he was driving down the highway and he audibly heard the word “come”.  He knew it wasn’t any of his thoughts nor something on the radio.  For him, it was that “still small voice”.  I was jealous.  I really was!  One day I was driving down the same highway and heard a song from the station I listen to everyday.  The repetitive verse was “This is your time”.  This particular radio station usually identifies the song but I didn’t catch the name nor the artist.  They also name the song and the artist on their website and the time they play it.  I did my research.  I knew the song that came before it and after it but on the website there was no song in between .  I have never heard the song since.

I had been contemplating making some career changes and had been praying about it.  To me, this experience was God reaching out.  Why?  Because it was different…it was weird and I have told him that I needed something out of the ordinary for me to get it…at least at first.  Almost like the story of Gideon where he questioned God to make sure that he knew what God wanted him to do (Read Judges 6-8) The part that made me most happy was that I recognized it as something coming from God.  Why? Because I prayed telling Him my desires and wanting my desires to be His desires for me.  But I also prayed for His will to be done.  Mark 11:24 NLT states “I tell you, you can pray for anything, and if you believe that you’ve received it, it will be yours.”  When we talk to and with God, we have to believe that what we ask for we will receive as long as we ask in Jesus’ name and it is according to God’s will for our lives.  Easier said than done but we must believe that what He wants for us is far better than what we want for ourselves.  Remember last week we read the verse Matthew 7:11 CEV which says, “As bad as you [we] are, you [we] still know how to give good gifts to your [our] children. But your [our] heavenly Father is even more ready to give good things to people who ask.”  He wants to give us good things and the career changes I made was definitely good things for me as well as my family.

Since then, I have not had one of those unusual songs but I have had impressions.  I still cry out many a nights “Lord, I can’t hear You” but I can also honestly say that the impressions I’ve had I knew led me to the right thing to do at that time.  I also believe it’s from Him because I am diligently seeking him and Jeremiah 29:13 NKJV tells us “And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.”

Dear God, help us to seek you, especially with our whole hearts meaning all of us.  We know you want good for us.  Sometimes we get so busy that we think we are doing what we are supposed to be doing because this is what landed on our laps but sometimes it is just busy work and not benefiting us nor the people around us.  Help us to hear You and know what it is You want us to do in all things…on the job, in our homes, in our relationships.  We need you and we need to hear from you!

I love You! I thank You! In Jesus’ name…Amen!